We Create What We Fear Most

          Lack of communication, and over-thinking are two things that can completely destroy a person's outlook on anything. I think sometimes when we don't know how to vocally express what we want or need, depending on how we DO react, it can be threatening. Maybe you start to act out, and test boundaries. You are trying to express that what you want is attention, but to everyone else, you just need to take a chill pill. And 9.5 times out of 10, what you get as a result of that behavior, is NEGATIVE attention, which, in my opinion is worse than none. 

        Life is all about trial and error. We learn how to act and communicate, but when we don't know how to, or we become impatient with other people, it is completely natural to overthink. One thing that I have learned over the past year is: we create what we fear most. What happens is we begin overthinking about a situation, and you immediately assume the worse. It's safer that way, right? Easier let down. Wrong. You have to take things for what they are; and a lot of times, that can be one of the hardest things to do sometimes because we feel anxious and pressured, and want answers right that second. When you assume the worse, it's only appropriate to plan for the worst, right? Wrong again. You end up making a situation, that for all you know, could be the complete opposite of how you're imagining it to be, and you turn it into the situation you're panicking over. Before you can get a handle on it, you have just created what you feared most. The worst part about that, is a lot of times when you have already reached that point, it's rare you get a do-over. 

          You have to know what you want and what you need. If you aren't ready to verbally express those emotions to others, you have to understand that the other people can't read your mind, and being patient is your best option. Easy for me to say, a lot harder for me to do. We all have our strong points, and our weak points. I know that patience is something I have to learn in order to not create a situation I do not want. 

        "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results." By that definition, I think we're all a little insane. Again, you have to use trial and error. If being obnoxious in an effort for attention fails, you have to stop. Don't push boundaries on purpose, because there comes a time when you push too far. And again, you don't get a do-over. Take things in as you learn them, learn what works and what doesn't, take a deep breath, and do not let your mind start wandering in the negative direction.

Prayers&Positivity

Becka

My Mom❤️

            I felt an overwhelming presence of my Mom as I sat down to write this. Today is her Birthday and this is one of the few days of the year when everything seems to 'hit me'. 

            I've been asked quite a few times if I miss my Mom. Half of the time, people expect me to say yes, and the other half thinks I'm hiding feelings when I hesitate to answer. Of course I miss my Mom, BUT not in the way you first would guess. What a lot of people don't understand is that this is my normal. This is how I grew up. You can't necessarily miss something you don't exactly remember. 

         I have memories of my Mom, yes, but few. I remember watching the Little Mermaid on repeat on the little TV in her nail salon while she had clients, and we'd occasionally eat ice cream together during the summer on her break. 

          I remember she always used to sit me on her lap on the recliner and read Charlotte's Web. She must have read that book to me an infinite amout of times. 

        I remember her taking me Trick-or-Treating when I was 3 and I dressed up as Elmo(it was a last minute costume, don't judge LOL). 

        This is where it gets difficult. For every positive memory I have with my Mom, I also have the bad ones. I don't know what she sounds like, I don't know her laugh, I don't know what perfume she wore, and I don't know what her hugs feel like. Losing my Mom is the sole thing that has effected my life in ways you could only understand if you've lost a parent. I see pictures and I so badly just want her to come to life through them and be physically here with me. I want to be able to come home and give her a hug. I want to go shopping with her and tell her when I'm upset, tell her when I'm happy, and be her best friend. I want her to look at me and tell me she's proud of me. I want her to sit next to my Dad at my graduation from High School, then College, I want her to be at my wedding. I want her to watch movies with me and let me vent when I need to. I would give ANYTHING on this earth to tell her how much I Love her and to hear her say it too. 

          There's a void in my life that will never be filled. As many positive women that enter my life, and do their best to be a "fill-in-Mom", it will never be enough. None of them are my Mom. I appreciate every person that has been there for me more than they probably know, but that void will always be there. When we got to choose names in French class to be "our name" for the year, I always used my Mom's name❤️ It gave me a small sense of security for 40 minutes everyday. 

       I have pain everyday. Some things we just aren't meat to fully understand. But I know that I'll be reunited with her someday;

I'll see her again. The things some people take for granted are the things I would literally give ANYTHING to have. Small things are important, I promise you. I lost my Mom physically, I can't see her, I can't hear her, but I gained a guardian angel. I know she's always looking out for me. I know a lot of people say that when loved ones pass, but I truly feel it. I can tell when her soul is with me and I feel her guiding me and spiritually being with me all the time. 

         I Love you so much, Mommy. There is not a day that goes by that I don't think about you. Happy Happy Birthday, beautiful❤️

~May 16, 1963 - January 12, 2001~

          

       

Be Your Best YOU!

       A big part of teenage life and young adulthood is the struggle to fit in and make friends. We all want to be surrounded by Love, and sometimes the want to be liked by everyone around us can trip us up. The power of Faith and a positive outlook is the sole reason I started Prayers&Positivity. Not only is it the title of my blog, but these two words have made it into all of my URL's, social media bio's, and sometimes even my signature.

        My grandma is one of the most important people in my life, and everywhere we go, she always knows SOMEONE! When I was younger, she and I were talking about people disliking others, and I said "well everyone Loves you!" (I mean, my grandma is the bomb-dot-com :* ) and she said something I will never forget: "oh honey, believe me, not everyone likes me. But that's okay; I don't like every single person in this world, so why would I expect every single person in this world to like me?" It clicked. 

        I'm someone who can develop a conversation with just about anyone, and I don't fight with people. However, that does not mean, under any circumstances that everyone likes me, nor do I expect them to. But that also doesn't mean that rejection doesn't hurt. If we upsetedly say "I don't know why they don't like me! I haven't done anything!", we often get told something along the lines of "that's life" or "you didn't do anything. Suck it up and move on". We're human. We have feelings. When someone admittedly doesn't like us, it hurts. I've had to learn not to personalize it, and take a step back and realize that if people are gossiping about me, there's something going on for them that has nothing to do with me. Even though you might feel as though it is a personal attack, it's not.

       Another thing I've learned is that if people talk to you about others, there is a big chance that they are going to talk to others about you. I used to think that saying wasn't always accurate, but over time, I've definitely learned it to be true. For example, I had mutual friends that both used me to talk bad about each other, and I had shown respect to both of them and I thought I was getting it back, but I later found out that they both did the same thing to me. Looking at the situation now, I can't help but laugh. One quote I really like is, "Your value does not decrease based on someone's inability to see your worth." I know who I am, and who I am not. No one on this earth can make me feel less than that. Go where you are celebrated, not tolerated. People who bring any sort of negativity to your life do not matter. Do not feel bad about removing toxic people from your life.

        One of my favorite Bible verses is Matthew 5:44, "...Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you." A relationship with God is the BEST relationship you could ever have. It is the ONLY relationship that is forever, because God is forever. When I feel alone, sad, hurt, weak, or broken, God is my strength. When I feel Love, happiness, and everything feels perfect in my life, God is behind it all. I never complain to Him. No matter how I'm feeling, I always Thank God for blessing me with the people and the things in my life that He has. I will always be grateful.

        Always remember to stay true to YOU. Stand up for what YOU believe in. Show the people you Love that you Love them, stay around positive people who show respect and Love, and do nothing less than show them respect and Love back. You only get ONE life, don't let others live it for you.

Prayers&Positivity

Becka

"Why Do You Write in a Journal?"

      I've been asked more times than one why I journal. I suppose it's because I've talked about it more times than one. There are a few reasons, and maybe this blog post will inspire you to start a journal if you don't already have one. I started writing in a little spiral journal when I was in 5th grade. I don't have it anymore because I wrote such nonsense, such as what show I was currently watching at the time and the entries consisted of maybe a good 5 or 6 sentences. However, I remember my first journal entry being about performing in the middle school talent show with one of my close friends. Cue the embarrassment...LOL. I started out just writing the positives of the day. That way, if I had had a bad day, I was forced to think about even the slightest bit of good that occurred.

         A big reason I write in my journal is because of how therapeutic it is. What I do is type all of my entries on my computer, because I can quickly pour all of my feelings out, and later on, I transfer it into my paper journal with pen. (Pencil fades and smudges over time....but I digress). I analyze everything! I don't just write "Today was a good day. I'm happy". I talk about WHY today was such a good day/ WHAT about it made me happy. I try to fill in as much detail as I can. 

       Another reason I keep a journal is to capture the beautiful memories. I would say that I have a pretty sharp memory, but sometimes when a long time passes, you don't remember details off the top of your head. If I received a text or call that made my day, or made me smile, I'll write about it. I can't tell you how many times I've re-read journal entries and think "Oh my gosh! I remember that now!" And it will still put a huge smile on my face. I was actually doing that earlier tonight, and I just have such gratitude for three amazing people that really made me feel like I was part of their family for the time being. I had never felt a sense of family connectivity before meeting them, and I will forever hold a place for them in my heart. A year has gone by, and I haven't forgotten them, or how they made me feel, but re-reading certain details made my heart melt. 

       I think writing in a journal is important for many reasons. I'm working on a few projects that I've had to go back and use journal entries for. It's also cool to sometimes read a journal entry from exactly a year prior, and see how much your life has, or maybe hasn't changed. Writing goals in a journal is also an idea, and something I sometimes do. If I go back and see that I haven't accomplished a goal, it's incentive for me to get a move on. Obviously it's disappointing to write "I'm going to accomplish this! I'm so excited!" And then a month later: "so my new plan is..." But, if I have accomplished a goal, it's a proud moment, and it pushes me to keep going. 

     If you have ever wondered why myself or other people maybe write so frequently in a journal, I hope this helps answer your questions. And if you don't currently write in a journal, I strongly encourage you to try it out! :)

Prayers&Positivity

Becka

'Jesus > Religion' Summary (Chapters 3 & 4) + Discussion Questions

                     If you have yet to read my blog on Chapters 1 & 2, I would recommend checking that one out before continuing reading! :) It's been about a week and a half, and I apologize for the delay in writing this; I've been enjoying time off of school...maybe a bit too much LOL. So here we go into the next two chapters!!

Chapter 3: Fundies, Fakes, and Other So-Called Christians
                  Jeff actually has a YouTube video under this same title [ http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=VNOkSLACLX8 ] He talks a lot about the stereotype of how many people "act Christian". Fundamentalists, in this chapter are referred to as the people who follow the "rules of Christianity" but don't actually apply them to their life, or understand why God wants certain things for our lives. They follow rules, but don't have the intimate relationship with Jesus Christ. Fakes are the people who I've heard several people complain about, and why a lot of people actually don't want to go to church, because there are those people that will shake your hand at service, but don't acknowledge you, or aren't Christian-like outside of the church. I really liked this chapter (as I do all of them!) because as I said, I've personally heard of this issue and people will tell me they don't go to church because of the fake people. However, instead of Jeff "bashing" the fundamentalists, or the fakes, he really questions our own judgment and lifts US up in not letting those people stop us from receiving God's grace. Jeff ends the chapter with the church story [I will link in the discussion question] that I could actually really relate to and again, he really wanted to challenge us to dig deep within ourselves.

*Highlights From the Chapter that Inspired Me*
"Jesus essentially said, 'I know my miracles are awesome. I know I have immense power. But don't follow me for the wrong reason. The cost is high." (pg. 39)

"Fundamentalism is living by the rules to stay out of trouble, rather than seeing the rules as tools to bring us intimacy and joy." (pg. 43)

"Persecution, like fire, burns up the weak elements (wood and hay), but actually purifies the strong ones (silver and gold)." (pg. 48)

Chapter 2 Discussion Questions (& some Answers)

The questions I've answered are ones that can be found in the book, or ones that I really wanted to include. The ones that I have left blank are questions you will have to answer personally. Take the time to read these questions and honestly answer them to how they apply to you!

 

1. Jeff would admit that he sometimes clings to religious rules or dead orthodoxy rather than living Faith. What about you?

2. Why do you think some rules -such as prohibitions against alcohol, swearing, and tattoos -are given more weight in religious circles than caring for the poor and downtrodden?
This is definitely an issue in society today, and it’s because a lot of people are unfortunately fundies, and because of that, they don’t know actual scripture, they know what myths have been passed down about Christianity over several hundred years, but because they don’t know what they’re preaching is false/no specific verse for it, they are also unaware of HOW MUCH the scripture tells us to love one another, and help each other.

 

 

3. Has the general Christian response to the gay community shown mercy, justice, and faithfulness? Why or why not?

*4. Jeff states, “Heaven isn’t a place for people who are scared of hell; it’s for people who love Jesus.” What’s your understanding of Heaven?*

 

5. “when we have no real transforming power of Jesus in our hearts, we still want to act as we always have, so we hold up a list of external behaviors so others can look at us and still see we’re Christians.” Has this been your experience? Explain.

6. If the kind of people you attract and repel reveals the authenticity of your faith, how are you doing?

7. In the parable of the two sons, the father wants both to enjoy the party. Are you more likely to resist or take part? Why?https://bible.org/seriespage/two-sons



Chapter 4: Religion Makes Enemies/Jesus Makes Friends
                 This is actually my favorite chapter thus far! Jeff starts it off with a story about an almost-fight he partook in in High School, and how at the time, he felt almost as though the cops showing up before anything really happened seemed like an adrenaline killer, but looking back he realizes it was God's saving grace. He then discusses the "hatred" we have for people who aren't the same as us, and how that developed/why we think that way. Religion is actually a big reason many people think that women, and gays are minorities. Religious people tend to think they're "good with God" because of just that, they're religious. And they start to act as if they know everything and they are on a pedestal. However, true Jesus-followers critique themselves, not others. Jeff states on page 63, "Last time I checked, I was my own worst enemy. No one has caused me more grief, pain, or heartache than I have. The Bible rarely tells me to fight against what I believe, but it frequently tells me to fight against my sin and the disease in me that's drawing me away from Jesus." Through this, he talks about how being a true Jesus-follower means loving someone even though they disagree with you. Again, I'm not going to give out any major spoilers, but there is one instance in particular he discusses with his Mom, and how they can disagree on it, but no one ever walks away from the discussion angry or upset. Another huge reason I Love this chapter is because it reminds me immensely of the quote "Don't judge someone just because they sin differently than you."


*Highlights From the Chapter than Inspired Me*
"Religious people see certain people as the enemies, when Jesus-followers see sin as the enemy." (pg. 63)

"We are greedy, filthy, idolatry-loving, glory-hungry thieves. And when we trust Jesus, he washes us. He redeems us-all of us." (pg. 66)

”God is always a fan of going to the marginalized so his saving power isn’t credited to human wisdom but to His grace.” (pg. 71)

”…if you ignore every single thing Jesus commanded you to do, you’re not a Christian. You’re just auditing. You’re not Christ’s followers. You’re just fans.” -Bill Maher

Chapter 4 Discussion Questions (& some Answers)

 

1. Why is it so hard to love “them”.
          In other words, why is it so hard to love people who view things differently than us?

 2. Jeff says he’s intrigued that Christianity flourished the most when it was under persecution and not sanctioned by the government. Why do you think that is the case?I’m actually intrigued by this as well, and I feel the reasoning is because trials and tribulations will always be what tests our Faith, and really makes us strong in our Faith, as opposed to when being sanctioned by the government, you can be a “fan” instead of a “follower” and no one will question it.

3. Have you ever tried washing yourself from your sin rather than letting Jesus do this work of grace?

4. Describe what most attracts you to the person of Jesus.First and foremost, the fact that He died for us is an AMAZING thing to think about. It’s way more than that, but for lack of a better word, AMAZING. How many people do you know would be torturously murdered for everyone else’s sins? Would you? I know I wouldn’t. and that alone attracts me to my Faith in Him because he Loves us that much. He wants us to succeed that much, and He is always there for us.

5. Jeff suggests that idolatry is “the act of placing anything or anyone above Jesus as the ultimate source of worth, satisfaction, and identity.” Why do we place other things above Jesus in our lives? Where do you find your worth, satisfaction, and identity?

6. If you were truly to follow Jesus, what would be different in your life? 

'Jesus > Religion' Summary (Chapters 1 & 2) + Discussion Questions

                  I really wanted to write about the book, Jesus > Religion by Jefferson Bethke. I finally received it this week, and I hate putting it down! Because there is so much in the book, and literally amazes me on every page, I'm going to blog about every 2 chapters. The book is titled after Jefferson Bethke's YouTube video, in which he is most known for. I am a huge fan of his because he's young (26), and therefore is able to reach out to the younger generations. Many of his YouTube videos are spoken words (poems), and he clearly dissects them in this book, along with talking about his life, and how his poems came about. No matter if you're a devoted Jesus-lover, or just coming to know the Lord, this book is SO worth the read!

Chapter 1: Will the Real Jesus Please Stand Up?
            Clearly a spin-off of Eminem's "The Real Slim Shady" LOL. In the first chapter, Jefferson talks about his faith growing up, and openly talks about how as a kid, he was a Christian by default. In other words, his Mom was taking him to church every Sunday, and she kept a Bible in the house, so he thought that automatically classified him as a Christian. In this chapter, he also talks about his Dad's absence in his life, and how he had resentment, which resulted in rebellion in school. He moved several times growing up, and discusses how that, too, had a negative part in his adolescence. I won't give any spoilers out, but he talks about what led him to God's grace while in college, and I think many people can relate to the situation Jeff was in.

*Highlights From the Chapter that Inspired Me*
"God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks to us in our conscience, but shouts in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world." ~C.S. Lewis

"The Bible isn't a rule book, it's a love letter.
I'm not an employee, I'm a child.
It's not about my performance, it's about Jesus' performance for me" (pg. 7)

"We've lost the real Jesus -or at least exchanged him for a newer, safer, sanitized, ineffectual one." (pg. 9)

"But we don't like a dangerous Jesus because a dangerous Jesus isn't a profitable Jesus." (pg. 11)

"The reason we aren't fulfilled or satisfied by our version of Christianity is because it isn't Christianity." (pg. 12)

Chapter 1 Discussion Questions (& some Answers)

The questions I've answered are ones that can be found in the book, and the ones that I have left blank are questions you will have to answer personally. Take the time to read these questions and honestly answer them to how they apply to you!

 

1. What do you think Jeff means by “My true religion, as it is with most of my American Peers, was just moralism dressed in Christian clothes?

 

He felt like he was a Christian because he grew up in a “Christian” environment; he was just going through the motions, but in his heart he hadn’t truly found Jesus. 

 

2. How has Christianity been the default option for you in your life?

3. After his Mom’s news about her sexuality, Jeff gave up on God and rebelled. He likens this rebellion to drinking salt-water. Have you ever tried to quench thirst but realized you were at the wrong source? If so, describe what happened.

In other words, have you tried to fill a void with something that couldn't? 

 

4. Why is the fear of silence the greatest fear for many in our culture, especially young adults?

5. Have you ever interpreted the Bible as a love letter? Why or why not?

In other words, have you ever looked at the Bible as God's Love for us?

6. Soon after he began to follow Jesus, Jeff realized he had been duped into following a safe, ineffectual Jesus -a Jesus of his own making -rather than the real one. Describe the real Jesus.
The real Jesus is described in the book as “dangerous”, but it is a good thing because if Jesus were as safe as society tries to make him, he wouldn’t have even had the opportunity to die on the cross for us. The world would be much more dangerous than the real Jesus today.

 

7. Jeff states that Christianity has become a financial industry. In what ways have you experienced this? Have you ever experienced Christianity rising above a consumer driven culture?

 

8. Have you been resistant to believing God’s plan might include discipline for your life? How might God use trials to help you become more like Jesus?

 9. Why do Christians focus more on supposed acts of righteousness than the needs of others?

 

 

 

Chapter 2:  Why I Still Think Jesus Hates Religion (And You Should Too)
                 Jeff talks about the irony in how he was a Christian when he transferred to a secular college, but not while he was previously at a Christian college. He became his dorm's RA his senior year, and that ultimately inspired him to write the poems, because he wanted to develop something that captured the attention of his fellow college students. One of the biggest things Jeff addresses in this chapter is how as humans, we try to hide our brokenness, and mask our insecurities from other people.

*Highlights From the Chapter that Inspired Me*
"You don't try Christianity; either your heart has been transformed by Jesus or it hasn't.
  
  But you can try religion.
  You can try to follow the rules.
  You can try to climb up to heaven.

But all you'll do is white-knuckle your way to religious despair. It won't work. It never does." (pg. 27)

[Excerpt from 'Jesus > Religion' spoken word]
"Religion says do. Jesus says done.
Religion is man searching for God. Jesus is God searching for man.
Religion is pursuing God by our moral efforts. Jesus is God pursuing us despite our moral efforts.
Religious people kill for what they believe. Jesus followers die for what they believe."
(pg. 28)

"Love is the new law.
The way I think about it is this: if I'm ever tempted to cheat on Alyssa, I could motivate myself by the law -I won't cheat on her because I might go to hell, etc. -or I could motivate myself with love -I don't want to cheat on her because she is better than anything out there. So it is with us and God. Jesus ushered in a more beautiful covenant. One that is perfected in love, not in hateful and fearful obedience." (pg. 30)

Chapter 2 Discussion Questions (& some Answers)

 

1. Jeff describes the brokenness he witnessed while he was an RA, a brokenness that remained largely hidden. What drives us to keep our brokenness hidden from others, and what does that cost us?

Especially in my generation, we want to seem almost perfect to others because we don’t want to be judged negatively, or we want to uphold a certain social status, but it’s very detrimental, because you can only pretend to be something you’re not for so long, and while you’re putting on that act, you’re denying yourself the truth, as well as the people motivating you to act that way. Lastly, the scripture says that we were all born sinners. By acting as though we’re not, we are almost claiming God as a liar, and we then are denying him as well.

2. Jeff writes, “My generation is the most fatherless and insecure generation that’s ever lived, and we are willing to sacrifice everything if we can just be told we are loved.” Do you agree with this assessment? Why or why not?

I agree with this statement whole-heartedly; as I answered in the first question, we want to be viewed a certain way so that we can gain positive attention, and this is just a more in-depth point. I’ve seen it, and also experienced it myself, that sometimes we get caught up in lust, or in what we think we want, that we might start doubting God’s morals, and plan for our life, because we’re seeing what we “want” right in front of us. We often forget that when we have God, we have everything we’ll ever need. He Loves us more than any human being could imagine.

3. Why do you think Christianity’s essence has devolved to “hates gays, can’t drink beer, and no tattoos” in the minds of so many? Is this a result of the institutional church, individual Christians, or something else?

I really think this is a belief that’s taught through the institutional church, because the institutional church is where the set of rules come from, and why so many people that go to church have this mentality. I know myself, before I REALLY came to know the Lord, I believed this too, because it’s what had been taught.

4. How has the Christian faith been more about good advice rather than good news in your experience?

How I’m interpreting this question is that often times, we as Christians go to the Lord for advice and guidance in a tough situation, when bad things are happening, but sometimes it’s rare when we take the good things as blessings. Again, before I REALLY came to know the Lord, I would mostly only go to him with problems, and when I was sad, but now I also thank him for every day, and for all of His blessings, big or small.

 

5. If relationship with Jesus is the new law, how does that influence your understanding of rules or expectations within Christian Faith communities? Does it shift your understanding about an external code? If so, how?

Having a true relationship with Jesus Christ influences my understanding of the rules that Christian Faith communities set because we are NOT God, and Jesus makes us realize that no, we sin every single day, we make mistakes every day; we are not perfect, but He Loves us as though we are. Christian Faith communities can make it seem like you have to be a literally perfect person, but Jesus wants us to accept that we’re not, and be happy with being perfectly flawed.

6. Jeff claims that he hates any system that promotes moral behavior as the only way to have a proper relationship with God. Do you agree? Why or why not?

 
7. How is the Jesus portrayed in the Gospels different from the Jesus promoted by religion?

In the Gospels, Jesus is portrayed as a man, who happens to be able to give sight to the blind, and turn water into wine, but from a religious standpoint, He is promoted as not being good enough for God, and saying that His sacrifice wasn’t necessary. In simpler terms, Jesus is good in the gospels, but evil in religion.

 

8. If God doesn’t want rule-followers, what does he expect from us as believers in Jesus?

God doesn’t necessarily want rule-followers, because you could be going through the motions, and not truly be following him with your heart. As I answered in questions 4, 5, and 6, is that He wants us to accept that we are not HIM! As humans, our lives end, and everything within us, is finite. Therefore it is impossible for us to not have sin. He wants us to develop a true relationship with him, and in doing so, you’ll look at things differently, but in the BEST way. Don’t only come to the Father in times of despair, but in even your smallest joyous moment.

Jesus > Society

         I've been wanting to write this blog for some time now, but I wanted to get my thoughts completely organized before I did. Where my heart is in writing this comes from personal experiences, as well as things I've seen and heard about. It goes without saying that especially as teenagers, and young adults, society can have a HUGE influence on us, and the choices we make. Society says "Sex before marriage is okay, everyone does it." Society says "Come play beer pong with us, everyone else will be there." Society tells us that anything everyone else does is okay. But just because everyone else does it, does not make it right in God's eyes.

          I'm going to get right into it, because this subject is going to kind of serve as the main topic of discussion: Premarital sex. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 -"ye should abstain from fornication (sexual intercourse between two consenting people who are not married to each other): that every one of you should know how to possess his vessel on sanctification and honor; not in the lust of concupiscence" (powerful feelings of physical desire). As teenagers, hormones are raging, and we have feelings and urges. But as I've stated in previous blogs, feelings are not bad; how we deal with them can be. 

         With the greatness of God, and his Love, forgiveness, peace, holiness, and grace, there is an evil that wants us to fail. God wants us to be great; he wants us to prosper. He wants us to be the BEST version of ourselves. But evil wants us to utterly and completely fail, to hurt, and to ruin the plan that God has for our lives. In wanting us to abstain from sex until we have entered the covenant of marriage, he is doing so to better serve our lives, not to punish us. 1 Corinthians 10:13 -"God is Faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able;" (God will NOT let you be tempted more than you can handle)

          Society tells boys that visiting a strip club when they enter adulthood is "what everyone does. It's normal." But strip clubs have sin written all over them. They are one of the many temptations out there that are waiting for us to fail. Because what are boys gaining from it? Lust. Matthew 5:28 -"But I say unto you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery." Guys, let me ask you something. If you have a good girl by your side, who KNOWS her self worth, who has inner beauty, who would do anything for you, you have the best of the best right there. So why would you want the lowest of the low somewhere else? You're idolizing a female who has low -if any self-esteem, no idea of her self worth, no love for you, or any other boy she's filling desires for, but that's what pleasures you? What does that say about how you view yourself? And I am not saying that if you're single, it's different. Because again, any form of sex was created for the pleasure between two married people. Society says "everyone has a stripper at their bachelor/bachelorette party!" I have always said that when I'm about to get married, I DO NOT want a stripper at my bachelorette party. If my friends don't respect that, and a stripper shows up, I will leave. It's not fun, it's not classy, it's not enjoyable, and it's not me. It's the same concept I stated with strip clubs. In 1 Corinthians 7:8-9, Paul says "for it is better to marry than to burn."

         This is just a stem from that topic; as far as I'm aware, most of society agrees that cheating on your partner is disgusting, and plenty of other adjectives we don't need to get into, but unfortunately, it happens. I've seen SO many people go through being cheated on, so I wanted to talk about it a little bit. You may think it's "cool" to talk to a lot of people at once, and see how many you can get to crush on you, or how many people you can "hook up" with. I'm definitely not the first one to say that it's not. The Seventh Commandment bluntly states "Thou shalt not commit adultery." Proverbs 6:32 -"whoever committeth adultery lacks understanding, and destroys his own soul." In my opinion, that verse says it all. 

          Society says "Come to this party and drink with all of us!" I'm not going to get into a spiel about how drugs and alcohol are bad; I'm sure you've all heard plenty in school and such, but I will say that drinking, especially underage does not put you at a higher ranking than anyone else. Ephesians 5:18 -"Don't be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, let the Holy Spirit fill you." Mind you, wine was what they called alcohol in general. 

        I did not write this to seem like a goody-two-shows by any means. I follow our creator who is a GREAT God, and I have views on things that I KNOW most people don't agree with...because I'm not agreeing with society. 

Prayers&Positivity

Becka